(Morisette, I belong to the zoo)
Nakatulong ba nung lumayo ako
'Di ba 'yon naman ang 'yong ginusto
Simula pa no'n, kahit hanggang ngayon
Lahat ng daan ay pabalik sa'yo
Balang araw ay makikita mong
'Di kailangan lumayo (kinailangang lumayo)
Kung paglisan lang ang paraan
Kahit nasa'n ka man
Nariyan pa ba ang pinangarap ko
Na aking tinalikuran para mabuo
Bakit ganon kahit sa'n lumingon
Lahat ng daan ay pabalik sa'yo
Balang araw ay makikita mong
'Di kailangan lumayo (Kinailangang lumayo)
Kung paglisan lang ang paraan
Kahit nasa'n ka man
Oooh oooh oooh
Nahanap nga sarili mo
Nawala naman ako
Masisisi mo pa ba
Kung ako'y sususuko na
Hindi mo man mapakinggan
Ang aking mga dahilan
Matatanggi mo bang
Mahal na mahal kita
Sa aking paglayag
Tiyak ika'y masasaktan
Hangad ko'y maintindihan
'Di maintindihan
Na sa tamang panahon
Hinding-hindi na iiwan
Kung 'yong pagbibigyan muli
'Di kayang pagbigyang muli
Kahit anong gawin
'Di na mababalik ang dati
Paalam, salamat
Salamat sa lahat
Balang araw ay makikita mo
'Di na sana lumayo ('Di ka sana lumayo)
Kung paglisan lang ang dahilan
Sa ating hangganan
Ikaw pa rin sana
This song is currently playing on repeat. May naalala lang ako. There goes a lot of "what-ifs"....Sigh
Currently reading: Leaders Eat Last - Simon Sinek
Currently watching: The Good Doctor S2E4 (English)
Currently feeling: reflective
Posted by princess_bride on August 8, 2019 at 09:16 PM | dance with me

I wake up early and go to work early to jumpstart my day. I feel sluggish and stressed if I do otherwise. Today, I am in as early as 7:30. We don't have strict time monitoring at work. I work from home most of the time actually. However, it is not the same for the team I belong in. Most of them come in late and go home late. I guess because most of them are single? Anyway, my point is....I am alone for 3 hours in the morning and it's freaky sometimes hahaha Good thing I have my music with me.

On another note, Grab these days are so expensive. Even when you do grabshare. I don't drive (and no plans of doing so anytime soon...hehehe) Hubby usually needs to be early on site so I am left to my own devices basically. It's good that I only go to work 2x a week. Otherwise it's just too difficult to commute. Ang init at ang lagkit pagdating sa office. Hassle. Grab needs to have strong competition so they don't monopolize the market. Sigh

Currently listening to: never really over - katy perry
Currently reading: Leaders Eat Last - Simon Sinek
Currently watching: Flower boy next door
Currently feeling: weird
Posted by princess_bride on July 9, 2019 at 10:26 AM | 2 danced with me

Been traveling a lot the past few months because of work commitments. Our business unit is working on an ISO certification and didn't realize that it entails a lot of work and preparation. This July scheduled to go to Australia to attend a conference in Sydney and then to go to Melbourne for a scrum meeting with my project team. The project I'm leading as executive sponsor have a big role in the ISO certification as we need to establish health & safety legal compliance management across the organization around the globe.

So not that used to traveling this frequent, my skin is breaking out! Ugh! At this age pa talaga. Never had this problem during my teen years. I guess brought about by stress too. But it's a good kind of stress. I'm learning a lot and I love what I'm doing. It's just that I am again setting aside time for my health. Too scared to go back to my Doctors for sure mapapagalitan na naman ako. hahaha Bakit ba kasi nauso ang diabetes? It's just so hard to manage. Nakakadepress minsan honestly. The 4x a day insulin injection, the numerous meds I had to take for a lot of things because of the complications brought about this disease. =(

I wouldn't want to end this entry on such a sad note. I'm in a happy place right now. Not perfect, but happy.

Currently listening to: patawad, paalam - moira & i belong to the zoo
Currently reading: Leaders Eat Last - Simon Sinek
Currently feeling: busy
Posted by princess_bride on July 4, 2019 at 09:51 AM | dance with me

“What greater thing is there for two human souls, than to feel that they are joined for life--to strengthen each other in all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting?”
George Eliot, Adam Bede

Hubby and I recently celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. It was surreal. Never thought we'd come this far. Many have asked what's the secret ingredient. Love? That's so cliche. I think we've reached beyond that stage when everything was all about love. It was about forgiveness, even when it hurt so much. It was about compromise, when you know very well that it will take a lot of sacrifice from you. It was about beautiful memories, when everything seems to be fading. It was about taking it all in thinking about your children and their future. It was about trying to forget the painful past. It was about self introspection and changing, knowing that somehow you always have to improve something to make your relationship work. It's a myriad of a lot of things put together. And it's making sure that both of you are choosing each other no matter what.

These days, it seems that relationships are too easy to give up on. And it's not surprising, with the kind of environment we have. It's so easy to be tempted and so easy to tempt. I never claimed that I was the best and ideal wife (I don't think there is such a thing). I have gone through a lot of pain physically, emotionally, mentally in making this marriage work. And I know that it was the same for him. But with God's help we are here now. Trying to be strong and choosing to love each other despite of and inspite of.

Now the journey to the next 25 years.....that is if I'm still alive by that time. hehehe

Currently listening to: How do you keep the music playing - James Ingram
Currently reading: Leaders Eat Last - Simon Sinek
Currently watching: The blacklist S6E6
Currently feeling: hopeful
Posted by princess_bride on June 6, 2019 at 10:08 AM | 2 danced with me

"Friendship means understanding, not agreement. It means forgiveness, not forgetting. It means the memories last, even if the contact is lost."

I have an old friend. Not literally old but a friend since I was in grade 3 (about 10 yrs old). We were busmates. We never were classmates in elementary but I think we were in high school. We also went to the same school. In college we pursued different courses but we went to the same University. So we practically grew up together.

She have been there during my highs and lows. She was my constant. My person. I have always been protective of her and tell on those people who hurt her. That is until recently. She was cornering another friend in a heated discussion. I stepped in. Nag "mommy mode" ako. She didn't take it well. She felt slighted na parang pinagalitan ko sya like a child. Well, she was acting like a child then.

So we haven't been in speaking terms since then. I know that she was going through something. I was worried but this time she kept it to herself. (this was before our "encounter") Which was hardly the case in the past, so I was really concerned about her and wanted to be there for her. But she kept pushing people away. At the end of the day, I realized that as a friend you can only do so much. I respected her silence so I let her be.

But going through something doesn't excuse one from being rude and disrespectful of others. I didn't feel comfortable sitting around letting her do that to other people. So I had to say my piece. She didn't like it. Fast forward to last week, I sent her a message that I remember something and that I miss her. I wasn't going to apologize for anything. I just wanted to let her know that whatever she is going through I will just be here if she needs me.

What she did? "Seen" mode. I expected as much. I'm just sad that 35 years of friendship is gone just like that. But guess what? What she did was a message to me. She was a bearer of God's message. Well, her actions were. Any relationship go through difficult times. But that doesn't mean that you give up on what you have. If she wants to be alone, so be it. You can only pray for her that she be enlightened and will be able to go through her issues with God's guiding light.

I do wish her well. I love her still and I will always be a friend when she needs one.

Currently listening to: have you ever seen the rain - credence clearwater revival
Currently feeling: hopeful
Posted by princess_bride on April 30, 2019 at 11:29 PM | dance with me

It's been a while since my last post. I visit daily to read entries and then attempt to write something and end up with nothing. I don't know but I think my creative juices is drying up. Or simply not inspired to write at all. Whatever it is I should think of this as an outlet and not a writing contest. I just feel that my entries are so lame and empty. Parang paulit ulit. Sabagay wala naman magbabasa Hahaha 5-10 na lang ata tao dito sa tabs. =) So who cares right?

So I will begin with the voyages I've been to the past few months - Ho Chi Minh Vietnam, Costa Rica and PP & El Nido Palawan. The first two are business related. I should have been to Belgium too for work but schedule was too tight to get a visa. Ok na din, it gets too tiring to have one travel after the other. Tumatanda na talaga ako. =( The Palawan trip was done during Holy Week. It was the only time where everybody is free. So sorry na Lord, ngayon lang naman kami pasaway. I have another one coming up for work - SG first week of May. It's for an ISO Lead Auditor Training. May 2 hour exam daw after. Good luck to me.

Anyway, got tummy sick after Palawan. Not sure if it was the Tamilok (wood worm) or the extreme heat or water. Ewan! It's really bad. I was afraid that my tummy would act up during the 1 hour flight. Nadaan naman sa diatabs. Napahinga ng one day tapos ayan na naman. Ang daming toxin ng tyan ko di ko malaman san ko nakuha. =( Ok lang naman Palawan was a wonderful experience. It was suprisingly clean inspite of being so touristy and all. DENR is doing a good job at making sure that they rehabilitate their area. Medyo hassle lang because of local restrictions but I am good for having them set up the process and even paying for the environmental fee. I am all for it. Para ma-maintain nila yung islands, kasi it's not an easy task ang daming pwedeng puntahan dun and I feel like we should go back for more. Wasn't even able to do Honda Bay in PP. Pinalit kse namin yung El Nido, which was sulit and super fun. Kapagod nga lang talaga.

Ewan ko ba parang chronic fatigue na nararamdaman ko. I'm afraid it has something to do with my kidneys este kidney kse nagiisa na lang pala sya. Huwag naman sana. Ang dami ko pa gusto puntahan. And gusto gawin. Pero ang sama ng feeling na para akong nauupos na kandila. I'm really scared. =( Ang dami ko na hindi kaya gawin. I dread walking too much, trekking, swimming in deep seas....ang dami kong fears, ang katawan ko din ayaw na magcooperate kahit na gusto ko gawin bumibigay na katawan ko.

Currently listening to: kung di rin lang ikaw - december ave & moira
Currently feeling: sick
Posted by princess_bride on April 25, 2019 at 11:17 AM | 2 danced with me

"When life closes a door, just open it again. It's a door that's how it works."


True that! It's just that sometimes one just can't help but overthink. Been feeling bad and sleep deprived because of this. Over nothing naman pala. Eventually, things fell into place and new doors were opened. Doors as in plural. Been stressing myself out over nothing.

Oh well, aside from the fact that my schedule is over the top these days. I just feel like I need and deserve a long break. I want to go to a beach and relax. Kelan kaya? Sigh


On my previous post about performance rating, apparently I still got a high mark. Discussed it with one of the leaders and she said just be thankful as others were not so lucky as I was. Mataas lang siguro talaga expectation ko sa sarili ko. I really should manage that.

I just need to divert all this energy spent on overthinking to other more productive activities.

Currently listening to: someone snoring hahaha
Currently reading: Revenge wears prada - Laura Weisberger
Currently watching: Drop Dead Diva
Currently feeling: busy
Posted by princess_bride on February 21, 2019 at 09:33 PM | dance with me

I wasn't the type who would just go through the motions. I always try to give more than what was expected. At the very least 101% effort. That's why when I went through my 2018 performance review with my leader I got so disappointed and felt like my efforts weren't really recognized nor appreciated. I didn't fail but neither did I excel in my rating. I was used to always having the highest rate with all my previous employers but here I guess because of the way the organization is structured and also having to report to a Doctor who leads the team as she is the owner of the budget I manage makes all the difference.

So what to do? I don't want to sit and cry in a corner just because this happened. Honestly performance ratings are never going to be objective. I just feel that at the rate I'm going, I don't think I will move forward in terms of career advancement in the near future here. I think I need to rethink what my next steps would be. I need to assess if at this age would it still be beneficial for me to look for other opportunities or just stay put and look for internal opportunities. I have been in my comfort zone for the past 4 years here. Is it time to move out?

Abangan ang susunod na kabanata. Sigh

Currently listening to: without me - halsey
Currently reading: Revenge wears prada - Laura Weisberger
Currently watching: Lucifer
Currently feeling: restless
Posted by princess_bride on January 24, 2019 at 10:13 AM | dance with me

Just in time. I need to be reminded of these:

1) Trust no one but respect everyone.

2) What happens in the office, remain in the office. Never take office gossips to home or vice versa.

3) Enter office on time, leave on time. Your desktop is not helping to improve your health.

4) Never make relationships in the work place. It will always backfire.

5) Expect nothing. If somebody helps, feel thankful. If not, you will learn to know things on your own.

6) Never rush for a position. If you get promoted, congrats, if not it doesn't matter. You will always be remembered for your knowledge and politeness, not for your designation.

7) Never run behind office stuff. You have better things to do in life.

8) Avoid taking everything on your ego. Your salary matters. You are being paid. Use your assets to get happiness.

9) It doesn't matter how people treat you. Be humble. You are not everyone's cup of tea.

10) In the end nothing matters except family, friends, home and inner peace.

World's Mental Health day theme by WHO

Mental Health at work place

Currently listening to: Malibu nights - Lany
Currently reading: Revenge wears prada - Laura Weisberger
Currently watching: Lucifer
Currently feeling: disappointed
Posted by princess_bride on January 22, 2019 at 10:46 PM | dance with me
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