princess_bride

It's been a while since my last post. I visit daily to read entries and then attempt to write something and end up with nothing. I don't know but I think my creative juices is drying up. Or simply not inspired to write at all. Whatever it is I should think of this as an outlet and not a writing contest. I just feel that my entries are so lame and empty. Parang paulit ulit. Sabagay wala naman magbabasa Hahaha 5-10 na lang ata tao dito sa tabs. =) So who cares right?

So I will begin with the voyages I've been to the past few months - Ho Chi Minh Vietnam, Costa Rica and PP & El Nido Palawan. The first two are business related. I should have been to Belgium too for work but schedule was too tight to get a visa. Ok na din, it gets too tiring to have one travel after the other. Tumatanda na talaga ako. =( The Palawan trip was done during Holy Week. It was the only time where everybody is free. So sorry na Lord, ngayon lang naman kami pasaway. I have another one coming up for work - SG first week of May. It's for an ISO Lead Auditor Training. May 2 hour exam daw after. Good luck to me.

Anyway, got tummy sick after Palawan. Not sure if it was the Tamilok (wood worm) or the extreme heat or water. Ewan! It's really bad. I was afraid that my tummy would act up during the 1 hour flight. Nadaan naman sa diatabs. Napahinga ng one day tapos ayan na naman. Ang daming toxin ng tyan ko di ko malaman san ko nakuha. =( Ok lang naman Palawan was a wonderful experience. It was suprisingly clean inspite of being so touristy and all. DENR is doing a good job at making sure that they rehabilitate their area. Medyo hassle lang because of local restrictions but I am good for having them set up the process and even paying for the environmental fee. I am all for it. Para ma-maintain nila yung islands, kasi it's not an easy task ang daming pwedeng puntahan dun and I feel like we should go back for more. Wasn't even able to do Honda Bay in PP. Pinalit kse namin yung El Nido, which was sulit and super fun. Kapagod nga lang talaga.

Ewan ko ba parang chronic fatigue na nararamdaman ko. I'm afraid it has something to do with my kidneys este kidney kse nagiisa na lang pala sya. Huwag naman sana. Ang dami ko pa gusto puntahan. And gusto gawin. Pero ang sama ng feeling na para akong nauupos na kandila. I'm really scared. =( Ang dami ko na hindi kaya gawin. I dread walking too much, trekking, swimming in deep seas....ang dami kong fears, ang katawan ko din ayaw na magcooperate kahit na gusto ko gawin bumibigay na katawan ko.

princess_bride

"Friendship means understanding, not agreement. It means forgiveness, not forgetting. It means the memories last, even if the contact is lost."

I have an old friend. Not literally old but a friend since I was in grade 3 (about 10 yrs old). We were busmates. We never were classmates in elementary but I think we were in high school. We also went to the same school. In college we pursued different courses but we went to the same University. So we practically grew up together.

She have been there during my highs and lows. She was my constant. My person. I have always been protective of her and tell on those people who hurt her. That is until recently. She was cornering another friend in a heated discussion. I stepped in. Nag "mommy mode" ako. She didn't take it well. She felt slighted na parang pinagalitan ko sya like a child. Well, she was acting like a child then.

So we haven't been in speaking terms since then. I know that she was going through something. I was worried but this time she kept it to herself. (this was before our "encounter") Which was hardly the case in the past, so I was really concerned about her and wanted to be there for her. But she kept pushing people away. At the end of the day, I realized that as a friend you can only do so much. I respected her silence so I let her be.

But going through something doesn't excuse one from being rude and disrespectful of others. I didn't feel comfortable sitting around letting her do that to other people. So I had to say my piece. She didn't like it. Fast forward to last week, I sent her a message that I remember something and that I miss her. I wasn't going to apologize for anything. I just wanted to let her know that whatever she is going through I will just be here if she needs me.

What she did? "Seen" mode. I expected as much. I'm just sad that 35 years of friendship is gone just like that. But guess what? What she did was a message to me. She was a bearer of God's message. Well, her actions were. Any relationship go through difficult times. But that doesn't mean that you give up on what you have. If she wants to be alone, so be it. You can only pray for her that she be enlightened and will be able to go through her issues with God's guiding light.

I do wish her well. I love her still and I will always be a friend when she needs one.