i am immensely addicted to reading the twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. an easy read i should say. i believe its meant for the young adults. but it has easily captured the hearts of the not-so-young like me.  i can hardly put it down, i am already 1/4 of the 2nd series "the new moon". what makes it captivating is the love story of two individuals that goes beyond the norms. i am such a sucker for romance.

i have scanned the Stephenie Meyer's twilight homepage and was surprised that she started writing this wonderful novel on my birthday June 2. What a coincidence. Well, I've been having sleepless nights lately because of this book and I think I can finish the series by next week. Although I still have to get the last two books (Eclipse and Breaking Dawn). I got easily interested in Vampire stories since Anne Rice. and I am totally falling in love with the characters of S. Meyer. everything is so surreal. you can also be so envious at how Edward loved Bella and vice versa.

loving against all odds. is it still real, or just make believe. sigh

i did something really drastic and downright juvenile last night. a friend texted me and informed me where to find the 3rd book from the "twilight" saga. (thanks sandz....hugs)  i have been looking for a week and was told from various bookstores that they were not sure when it will be available. i already had the breaking dawn (4th) and i was just itching to read some more. it was an epidemic alright. this twilight fever. anyway, i was at home when my friend told me where to get it. i cannot think twice or i may be too late again.

so looking at my watch, 7:30 i had a lot of time in my hands to drop by and grab the book. so i changed from my pj's to my jeans and white shirt. and rushed out of the house. my son texted me "goodluck in getting the book" hahaha....he understands my need for it. its like a drug i can't get rid of.  yeah i know, its only now that i felt this need and desperation to get hold of a book. looking back, i can only just smile. i'm happy i have what i wanted.

and the excitement continues....i have finished the "eclipse" during twilight today (hmm how convenient). i am heady due to anticipation for the upcoming events in the 4th and final book. i won't spill. read the book its worth your time. can't wait to watch the movie on Nov 21.

finished reading "breaking dawn" yesterday. amazing series. it will get you hooked till the end. there was a twist that i didn't foresee. i'm happy though because it brought a balance to the love triangle. you can't help but be envious of edward's love for bella human or otherwise. "my vampire" as how bella refers to him in the story.  ooppsss...i won't spoil the fun. keep reading people.

***** 

looking forward to another business trip. this time Indonesia. maybe end of october or first wk of november. another SOX Testing activity. (internal control audit) i am joining the same team that went to thailand last september. better, at least it won't be difficult to work together. my malaysian colleague Kamala, who is a very warm and motherly person will be there. in such a short time we became good friends and shopping partners. i hope in this trip we can have more time to go around. (i wish)

*****

i was inspired by a good friend (thanks Teach) and have been practicing the things i've learned from the book "the secret". actually, this has been shared by many authors in the past. rhonda byrne just made it easier to grasp. all you have to do is believe. it is truly life changing i have witnessed a major improvement in my friend's life and perspective and have started experiencing the benefits personally as early as now. you have to attract the good things in your life...and how to do it is all there in the book. another interesting read i must say.

*****

after the twilight series, i have started on s. meyer's new book "the host". i don't know if she can duplicate the "twilight" phenomenon. this time its more for the adult readers. i realized that i've read her four bestselling books in just a week. i wonder how long i can finish this one. hmmm

i came across a preview of fear factor phil. edition and saw this part where big rats literally thrown over a woman's face. and it grossed me out. eewww...not in a million years or even a million pesos will make me go through that. nevah!

so i got the idea of coming up with the top things that creeps me out...here goes:

1) roaches - yup i hate their smell or the feeling of having them crawl over your skin. yuck!

2) fear of heights - i can climb steep stairs or look down a bldg from the 20th floor...but without support or anything makes my knees weak.

3) ferris wheel or any ride for that matter that entails fast moving rides and heights - enchanted kingdom does not appeal me in anyway whatsoever. i can only handle the carousel and bump cars. other than that, i am totally KJ to be with.

4) horror movies - i cannot watch horror movies period. it makes we wake up in the middle of the night scared out of my wits.

5) snakes - i can look at them but having them crawl all over will instantly kill me. (crawl pa lang yan ha) 

so there.....what's yours?

"...Not forgiving needs to be reconceived. It is not an avoidance of forgiveness or a retreat into paranoia, but a legitimate action in itself, with its own progression, motivation and justification. There are many circumstances in which it is the proper and most emotionally authentic course of action."

I had the strangest dream last night of making peace with an estranged friend. It is not in my nature to bear grudges for a long period of time. Mabilis ako magpatawad or magpakumbaba sa mga pagkakasala ko. To err is human after all. But I don't make it an excuse to make mistakes. Instead I make conscious effort not to hurt others kasi ayoko din masaktan. 

The thing with this specific friend is, she just detached herself from the friendship. Leaving me wracking my brains for any reason for her doubtful behavior. The sad thing is she's the godmother of my youngest kid. Minsan gusto ko na lang isoli ang kandila para matapos na ang lahat. Pero hindi ganon ang style ko.

We work in the same organization, we cross paths once or twice. I have even sent her an email to let her know that we are working again for the same Company. And all these reaching out efforts turned out futile. Nakakapagod din kasi lalo na alam ko deep in my heart that what we shared before will always be special. Well, to me na lang siguro.

Its just weird for me to dream about her. It was so real. We were hugging and laughing...when I woke up I was sad it was just a dream. Because the truth of the matter is, I miss her. She was a good friend to me not so long ago.

So here's a simple message for you Cheng: Andito lang ako kung maalala mo ulit na magkaibigan tayo. Nasasaktan ako sa mga ginagawa mo ngayon pero ang dasal ko lang ginagawa mo lahat yan for a valid reason. I wish you all the best in your life. Sa ngayon, aaminin ko may sama ako ng loob sayo. Because you keep on rejecting me. Pero sino ba naman ako para magtanim ng galit. Ang Diyos nga marunong magpatawad diba? Ako pa? Kung dadating ang panahon na nangailangan ka ng kaibigan, you know where to reach me, andito lang ako. 

i am hooked at playing games on my daughter's PSP. very useful especially when waiting long queues in a doctors clinic or waiting for your lab tests to be done. i specifically enjoy playing: the sims castaway (i have only explored two islands, i think there's a third one), downstream panic (strategy game on saving the little fish from the big sharks i'm on level 42 already out of the 80 levels), loco roco (very colorful and simple game), etc.

i am actually looking into getting one for myself. that would make three psp's in one family. too much i suppose. so now i'm weighing my options between the PSP and the Nintendo DS Lite. of course, this is just wishful thinking at the moment since i have other priorities to consider. but i enjoy doing this, making my wishlist every now and then. its free to dream anyway.

checked the web for comparison and it seems that feature-wise PSP still dominates. well considering other factors than that, i believe it depends on your preference. since you will be the user anyway, best to consider what feature you will maximize. personally, i don't need the audio/video stuff since i already have this on my ipod. but having used the PSP i wonder if i can sacrifice the screen resolution i enjoy and also the games that i have learned to love playing.

so anyhoo, i would like to quote shopwiki.com for an apple to apple comparison of the two gaming gadgets:

Nintendo DS Lite

Design: The titanium DS clamshell design opens up to a dual-screen gaming experience, giving the system its name. The keypad setup, shoulder buttons, and directional button are similar to other Nintendo products, so existing Nintendo users should be very comfortable with it.

Size: The DS Lite is slimmer than the original DS model, although it's bulky when compared with the Game Boy Advance or the Game Boy Micro.

Screen Resolution: 256x192 pixels with 260,000 colors. More isn't always better. The two screens lack in resolution compared to the PSP, but they have minimal glare and the bottom screen is actually a touch screen. You can use a stylus or a thumb piece to navigate around it for writing messages, drawing in PictoChat, or other innovative, game-specific uses. The DS Lite also has adjustable brightness settings.

Media and Memory: The DS Lite has a dual-slot design for the game cartridges, meaning that it has backwards compatibility with the Game Boy Advance -- a big plus for your wallet if you already own lots of GBA games.

Connectivity: Wireless connection capability allows gamers to play with or against each other as well as chat and send messages via PictoChat. For direct connections (LAN play), you must be within 150ft. in open space, but only 30ft. when there are walls between. However, Nintendo has recently brought the DS online, allowing users to play against others via the Internet. All you need is a WiFi hotspot or wireless network in your home. Also, if you want to download new games and even use the device as a type of PDA, supposedly Nintendo will release V-pocket, making the DS palm-compatible in the very near future.

Audio: The audio on the DS makes a big difference with two large speakers that react like a surround sound setup would.

Battery Life: Great battery life on this baby, lasting 10 solid hours and then some, which is better than the PSP.

PSP

Design: The slick PSP resembles its full-size PlayStation counterpart except for the analog nub, which doesn't protrude like on a normal PS2 controller. The non clamshell design leaves the screen exposed, but you can buy a plastic screen guard.

Size: While the PSP doesn't have dual screens, it does have one massive 4.3" screen, which makes gaming on this device a real treat and not at all hard on the eyes. The system is slender but long, and thus tough to carry around in your pocket.

Screen Resolution: 480x272 pixel resolution and 16.77 million colors. While not impressive compared to a PS2, the PSP is pretty accomplished for Sony's first shot at a handheld system and it definitely outshines the DS. The screen doesn't have any touch functionality like the DS and it tends to attract smudges and fingerprints.

Media and Memory: The PSP requires UMD discs (they look like mini discs) for watching movies and playing games, but they aren't rewritable. You then need a separate Memory Stick to store games, game saves, music, photos, and video. The $250 PSP Value Pack comes with a 32Mb Stick, however, this is hardly enough to store more than one game save and a couple songs. Extra storage, such as a 1GB Stick ($70-$100) is expensive, but it's the only way to get the optimum use of the PSP's many features.

Connectivity: With built-in WiFi, you can access the Internet via the Web browser anywhere there is a wireless connection.

Audio: Sound quality is okay, but not comparable to listening to a dedicated MP3 device like an iPod.

Extras: The PSP does more than just play games. It can play movies, MP3s, M3Us, WAVs, and AAC-formatted files, but not songs downloaded from iTunes. It can also display photos that are stored on a memory chip (TIFFs, PNGs, JPGs, GIFs, and BMPs).

no need to rush on my preferred gaming gadget anytime soon, its just nice to dream on stuff like these. hmmm as some say in the Philippines, "tumatanda kang paurong". hehehe i would like to think not though. i would rather be referred to as "young at heart". hahaha... i wish!