i snagged this from intruhspekt's journal. thanks for letting me borrow this.

*****************************************

I want to tell you everything.
I want to be moved by what you have to say.
I want to work together towards one purpose.
But you're not here.
My thoughts build up and wander in my head.
My passions stagnate and my actions lay still.
I walk alone.


This is not how I want to be.
I don't want to change for you.
I don't want to wait for you.
I don't live for you, and I never will.
You are not my greatest desire.
I hate the thought of you.
My weaknesses are prodded.
My sins exposed.

I thought silence and solitude would be my friends.
Not yet.
I thought I would grow and find strength in the desert.
I thirst.
But I don't drink the cup of water in front of me.

I want tomorrow to come,
but not if it's the same as today.

Sigh.
I want.

No more.