i snagged this from intruhspekt's journal. thanks for letting me borrow this.

*****************************************

I want to tell you everything.
I want to be moved by what you have to say.
I want to work together towards one purpose.
But you're not here.
My thoughts build up and wander in my head.
My passions stagnate and my actions lay still.
I walk alone.


This is not how I want to be.
I don't want to change for you.
I don't want to wait for you.
I don't live for you, and I never will.
You are not my greatest desire.
I hate the thought of you.
My weaknesses are prodded.
My sins exposed.

I thought silence and solitude would be my friends.
Not yet.
I thought I would grow and find strength in the desert.
I thirst.
But I don't drink the cup of water in front of me.

I want tomorrow to come,
but not if it's the same as today.

Sigh.
I want.

No more.
Currently listening to: say what you want - texas
Currently feeling: tired
Posted by princess_bride on October 17, 2006 at 04:37 PM | 4 danced with me
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Comment posted on October 18th, 2006 at 04:40 AM
Whew, how i wish im there beside you to give you a hug. Well, i just hope that my prayers could help. :) :)
i cannot really convince you to be happy when you are hurting inside but i do still hope that i am wrong. :) :)
Comment posted on October 18th, 2006 at 09:58 AM
thanks balong. you made me smile today. *hugs*
Comment posted on October 18th, 2006 at 04:25 PM
will someone get a scalpel and see if my heart is still beating?
Comment posted on October 18th, 2006 at 05:07 PM
hehehehe...of course it is! don't lose hope sis. there is always something beautiful around the bend. baka nagkamali ka ng ikot? :-D cheer up. *hugs*