i hate it when our dispenser at the office gives me tap water instead of hot water for my morning coffee. i'm fighting my intense need for sleep today. got the chills last night, i guess its over fatigue or flu, i really don't know. my whole body's aching i had to gobble up two analgesic capsules to quickly recover from the fever. can't miss work today. two of my supervisors are on leave. sighhhh...

been thinking a lot lately. my hubby (yes we've managed to work things out for the nth time) is leaving for Dubai in a month's time. been so dependent on him when it comes to being the substitute mom when my kids need me and i need to work. he manages the household while i'm spending a minimum of 12 hours a day at work. or spending my weekends working on my sideline. everything that he does suddenly got magnified now that he's leaving.

i used to think that i lost my love for him a long time ago. we spent time apart a lot of times, but the thought of him being out of reach is freaking me out. now that i am practically alone and him being my only family around is making me really lonely. we had big fights in the past, i even left him for awhile but when we both realized how much we still feel for each other always makes us reconsider things. when we were younger i also used to think that i love him more than he does. but after our last separation, he made a 360 degree turn and showed me that he wants me back and will change for the better.

now, he loves me more than i do. and i am on my way to getting that old feeling back. it just feels so good to be loved and taken cared of. maybe the reason why my other relationships while we were apart never worked out was the fact that he's the ONLY ONE for me. cheesy? yeah, maybe....but i must say this....I LOVE HIM MORE TODAY THAN YESTERDAY....BUT NOT AS MUCH AS TOMORROW.