letting go
why, with as much pain as it endures in hanging on, does the heart refuse to let go?
how do you when its time do give up? on a relationship or a friendship? where do you draw the line between compromising your own happiness and trying to be the better person in making the necessary sacrifices to make it work? when do you know when to stop bending your own wants and needs in order to make it work? When do you know that the pain outweighs the happiness? When do you decide when the pain that you are experiencing while making these sacrifices is enough?
Its always hard to let go of someone that has become such a vital part of your life. Sometimes you have gotten so accustomed to them being around that you dont know exactly how your life would work without them. You need them to be there..to be in your life. But it takes two people to be in a relationship. It takes two people to compromise, sacrifice, and understand. It takes two people to shed tears, to talk it out, to try, and it takes two people to care for a relationship to work. It takes equal amount of work from both sides. Just one person can't carry the burden of two.
It takes an amazingly strong person to know when and how to end a relationship, which ,though is one of the most important things in life, causes you more hurt that you can take. But on the other hand, maybe it takes the more noble person, the stronger person to endure the pain and try until they can't anymore. Most of us are just so enamored with the idea of hope. It keeps us going..keeps pushing us to try because maybe it will turn out just the way we want it to. Maybe theres a reward for continuing to hang on. Hope..it keeps us thinking..that maybe..just maybe the other person will realize the sacrifices you have made..how important you are to them..and how they dont wanna ever lose you. Maybe they will finally lay you down a bed of roses or maybe just at least reciprocate your feelings and actions.
I guess in the end, you can't really answer these questions. Sometimes you just can't do anymore but hope that everything will turn out for the best. But sometimes the best means ending it. There's no sure way of knowing. Just like life, there are never any certainties. But knowing that you are a good person and you are trying your best, I guess all that you can do is fight until you can't anymore, then be fought for..
(~quezy's journal)